Feb 11, Chris, time is supposed to relieve empty feelings and dull the hurt, and even soften anger. Well, time has marched on and I have aged well beyond the four years since you left us. I still hurt and I get very angry when I think that such a good, loving, talented, honest and wonderful person was taken from this world and an old fossil like me was allowed to stay. If there is an all powerful god, one that can change outcomes daily and is even said to have some “master plan,” why you and not me? Of all the wrong things that have happened in my life over the past five or six years, you leaving us was the epitome of a waste. Some have even stolen your music and called it their own, yet another travesty allowed to happen. Where is the all powerful entity when that kind of wrong takes place?
On your birthday I took the afternoon off from work before coming here — I wish I hadn’t. I had way too much time to think. As much as I try to keep occupied, even when I’m really busy, not one day goes by without you slipping into my thoughts. You of all people know how hard it is for me to cry. Well, as you know, I do. Son, how I miss you.
I forgot to bring the camera so your Mom said we would just use her camera phone. Great idea, but I couldn’t figure out how to get the pictures from her phone to my computer, even after two trips out to buy parts and six hours spent trying. After all that, we got the camera and came back today to take the beautiful pictures that are here. We are so happy that we came back. We were surprised and very pleased to find that someone had left an unsigned birthday card for you, and some very kind people named Nathan & Marci had left a card for us. A very special day — your birthday. sw/2-12-2007
April 6th 2007
Chris we have been thinking about you for a while now and happened to find these roses. Well, we just had to bring them over here for you.
The tree has really grown and the grounds have been well cared for. We suspect someone is watering the tree.
April 23rd
Chris, Tracy got married last evening on the beach in St Petersburg. She was beautiful, but you already knew that. For us it was bittersweet, but we were there for her, and for you… On our way back home today we stopped by to place these six white roses here as a symbol of something that is too difficult to put into words. We love you forever.
May 13th
Sweet Chris
Another Mother’s Day – the fifth since we spent our last one together. We brought red roses to honor your life. On this day dedicated to honoring moms it occurred to me that it is me who is blessed to have four handsome sons, each remarkable in his own way, and how proud I am to be their mom. I love you so very much.
Your proud mom.
September 6th
Another year…. We arrived to find this special place neat and with the grass mowed. Someone has kept weeds and grass from growing in the white rocks we put around the cherub and under the tree. Every time we come, I look around and ask why? But there is still no answer.
We brought red roses and found the beautiful flowers that Diana left last evening. We spent some time arranging the flowers and not saying much. The gentleman who lives just across the street brought water for the plants, a very nice gesture. Then, a wonderful young person named Cindy stopped by and put a vase full of beautiful carnations along with a card under the tree. She told us that she admired you and your work with kids. Proof once again that you have touched so very many people in ways that still make a difference, and, that your incredible voice is not the most beautiful of your legacies. sw/9/07/2007
December 20th
Chris, we came over on December 14th to bring and decorate a small tree because we thought the other tree had gotten too big to decorate. We found the Cherub missing. We went ahead and decorated the tree, and after some discussion we decided to replace the Cherub after the New Year.
We came back by on December 20th to check on the tree on our way to the mountains for Christmas. The tree was there and looked quite nice. When we came back on January 6th to get the tree and take it home, we found that someone had taken it.
We do not understand why anyone would do such a thing. This makes two Cherubs that have been taken, and now the tree. We hope the person that took the tree couldn’t afford to buy one and has kids at home. That we can appreciate and although we don’t like the tree being removed, we will and can forgive and understand. The Cherubs, are another matter??
We will be replacing the Cherub and if it gets stolen again, we will replace it again. However, we will be taking some measures to make it harder for someone who takes it to explain where it came from and why they have it.
Christmas was again just another day in all the very long days that we have. Some days are colder than others and some longer and darker… How we miss you.
P.S. We have decided that next year we will bring a ladder over and decorate the big tree. They will have to cut it down or dig it up to steal it. sw/1/06/2008
P.P.S. We think that the city, county or state has been removing the cherubs. We have learned that we will not be able to have the cherubs here for you. We understand and know that you will also. sw/2/16/2008
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